A few weeks ago, I heard—through hearsay—that someone would not attend one of our High Protocol events (Afternoon Tea or Dinner) because they wanted their submissive to sit with them at the main table. In that scenario, the submissive would be seated as a guest alongside others from the Left side of the slash.
Now, I want to be clear: I am incredibly proud of the work we do in High Protocol. What we offer is not simply a “High Protocol dinner.” It is an immersive experience—an epicurean delight, carefully structured, intentional, and deeply meaningful. When we say we have created the gold standard, I truly believe it.
That comment stayed with me longer than it probably should have. It wasn’t even said directly to me, and I know that every High Protocol event is different. There is no universal “right” or “wrong” way to do it. But what we create feels like something far beyond anything I have personally experienced or even heard of elsewhere.
Most High Protocol events provide protocols as a simple list in an email. There may not be training, preparation, or guided immersion. What we do is different—we teach, we mentor, and we build an entire evening around the embodied experience of service, structure, and power exchange.
And while I’m not trying to brag, I do want to acknowledge that what we offer is extraordinary. Our reviews reflect that, and the community response has been deeply affirming.
That said, this situation made me look at High Protocol through a different lens. I began wondering: what would it look like if the Right side of the slash sat at the table with the Left side? How would that work logistically?
Would we need to hire servers?
Would it still be a one-to-one or two-to-one service?
Would submissives still rise between courses to clear, serve, and reset the table—then return to their seats?
The questions quickly became endless. I’m sure, with time, I could design something functional, but it would be an entirely different kind of event.
So, back to my original dilemma: my feelings were hurt, because I am so proud of what we have created. I kept turning it over in my mind, trying to imagine how an event like that would feel.
And eventually, I realized something important: wouldn’t that simply be a formal dinner?
In a formal dinner, everyone sits together at the same table. It can still be elegant. It can still be an epicurean experience. You could even impose rules and protocols for the Right side of the slash to follow.
But that is not what High Protocol means to me.
To me, High Protocol is about service. It is about the Right side honoring the Left side through intentional acts of devotion, respect, and structure. It is one of the highest honors to serve in this capacity. It is also a beautiful, visible expression of dynamic and power exchange.
I love everything about it.
So I want to ask those of you reading:
What do you believe High Protocol events should look like?
In your opinion, if submissives are seated at the table as guests, is that still High Protocol… or does it become something closer to a formal dinner?
I would genuinely love to hear your thoughts.
